Change is a terrifying thing.
Of course, the bipolarity of change is a beautiful thing.
Having said that, I hate change for so many reasons. I want to be a kid forever. I want to be in love forever. I want to be in one beautiful moment forever.
On the other hand, I love change because change connotes growth, maturity, complexity. I want to experience all the intricacies of love, even if that means pain is necessarily involved. I not only want to see the world; I want to experience it.
These days, I think about her a lot. If I think about her for more than a few seconds, the pain becomes unbearable.
I crave real human connection. No bullshitting, no shit-talking, no joking around. Just very real dialogue that changes you once the conversation is over.